Steve Irwin, The Crocodile Hunter = Dead

You know that guy, Steve Irwin, who went around fucking with wild animals. The guy would say thing’s like, “aw, gee, I think i really pissed ’em off that time!” and continue to mess with them. All for our viewing pleasure.

Well, apparently he was killed earlier today. My first thought was that a ‘croc’ must have bit his head off. I was Wrong. Turns out he got stabbed through the chest by a sting ray. yeah, right through the chest, as in impaled. Is that even possible?

As far as I know nobody has ever before in the history of mankind been stabbed through the fucking chest by a sting ray. That should be a pretty good indication of how much they hated this guy. Rays might whip your leg or something if you bothered them. It’s thier way of saying ‘Dude, knock it off, I’m a sting ray, I’ll kick your ass” I repeat… only if you BOTHER them. Normally they’ll just swim away if you’re getting on their nerves.

He probably tried to grab it by the tail or something and I guess it just had enough of his shenanigans. Apparently, to Steve’s surprise, sting rays don’t take shit from anybody.

It was bound to happen sooner or later, and yes, Steve you’ll be missed… I always enjoyed watching your show. But lets not kid ourselves here. The only reason anyone really watched it was because they were secretly hoping to see something venomous bite you so you would get rushed to the hospital. We knew if a ‘croc’ actually killed you the episode wouldn’t be shown, but we hoped anyway!

Who knows, maybe they got the whole thing on tape and could dub your voice from some old crocodile hunter episodes. That would be pretty cool.

This is what Steve has to say on the matter.

“My number one rule is to keep that camera rolling. Even if it’s shaky or slightly out of focus, I don’t give a rip. “Even if a big old alligator is chewing me up I want to go down and go, ‘Crikey!’ just before I die. That would be the ultimate for me.” – Steve Irwin

We might never see the footage but I’m sure it would go something like this:



  1. Dawn  September 4, 2006

    Yes, you probably are going to hell for this, BUT ITS FUNNY AS FUCK!!!!

  2. Beercrazyjen  September 4, 2006

    ROFLMMFAO! Sad, but the pic is funny.


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