Revenge of the fat: The Second part in the ‘Fat’ series.
Not so long ago, in this damn galaxy (not a far far away galaxy, nobody cares about far away galaxies anyway) there was a man. Nothing remarkably special about him…Just a man. At one point in his life he was a sexy bitch and all the girls wanted him. No, really, stop laughing damn it, they did. It did not last, the evil calorie forces had set out to weigh the man down. (pun intended)
This man got involved in an epic war fighting the Fat! The battles raged on and the man forced the fat back, their lines (waist, that is) steadily retreating. The casualties were many, snack’s, soda, fast food, were abandoned by the man and left to rot.
The scale of justice tipped in the mans favor, predicting the victory. The war was all but won and the man rejoiced. He could have not foreseen the treachery of his own kind. For it was the man’s family and friends who invited defeat into his house.
The first sign of trouble came one night as the man’s door bell rang. His wife had answered the door, yet nobody entered, they simply ‘delivered’ the fatal package. The smell came next. It was unbearable. His wife called him. He tried his hardest to resist. And then finally….
“Fuck. That pizza smells good. No, that pizza smells fucking great!”
-Just one slice wont hurt you –
-don’t do it!-
-come on it’s just some pizza you can run tomarrow and work it off-
-if you eat that…there’s no going back.. is that what you want? to be fat?!-
The inner turmoil. The man now had to battle the demons in his head. The forces of fat had pulled off a massive sneak attack, the likes of which has not been seen sense the last pizza guy came over. He was doomed.
From upstairs he yelled down to his wife.
“Hun! cut me a few slices of that pizza!”
“yeah….and, uh, a beer… grab me a beer too!”
-yeah that’s it babe beer and pizza-
-you know you fucked up now right?-
-hey tomorrow you should stop and grab some MCgriddles from McDonalds for breakfast in the morning, that sounds good doesn’t it?-
And fucked he was. Countless beers, pizzas, burgers, candy bar’s later. (5 months) The man is as fat as he ever was.
He’s assessed the damage. He knows the odds are not in his favor but he’s ready to fight again. As we speak he is plotting his next move…in the battle of the fat.Share