When I first awoke on this cold winter day,
I knew not who I was, no feeling, and I could not recall a thing,
The light stung my eyes as i focused on the sky,
It was the brilliant setting sun, that made nothing in this place feel right.
It’s brilliance triggered thoughts of the dying, of hell, and of the dead,
The senseless nature of the sorrow eating away inside my head,
Never have I felt so frozen, panic began to grow, at least the numbness faded,
as i stood up from the snow.
DÃ©jÃ Vu, have i been here before?
DÃ©jÃ Vu, everything is so familiar.
DÃ©jÃ Vu, have i lived this all before?
DÃ©jÃ Vu, Why cant I can’t remember?
My tears quickly froze as they crawled down my face,
why have I been left alone in this unknown, yet familiar place,
I watched the sky darken, as the seconds ticked slowly away,
and with each darker shade, a lost memory began to play…
They started out slowly and progressed into a flood,
First at the beginning, then continuing into my own blood,
not sure what it meant, nor could i grasp the importance,
all because i was blinded by the cold, and defend by the silence.
Suddenly I could recall the abuse that had been my life,
A flash of silver, I remembered, sharpening of the knife,
As night dragged on these lost memories began to slow,
Until i was certain, there were but few important things left to know.
DÃ©jÃ Vu, I have been here before.
DÃ©jÃ Vu, it is so familiar.
DÃ©jÃ Vu, I feel as if i have died before.
DÃ©jÃ Vu, but still can’t remember!
Only my own guilt, while I’ve been hiding in this place,
Seems like forever, always forgotten, somehow erased,
As the pieces come together, for me, there is no escape,
Terrorfied of sunrise, and of the truth must i face?
I remember what I did, this puzzle has been complete,
One hundred thousand times, I’ve begged to be freed,
I wish I would have tried, but I took a cowards way out,
My pleas of forgiveness now a million times denied.
DÃ©jÃ Vu, I tried to leave here before,
DÃ©jÃ Vu, forever familiar,
DÃ©jÃ Vu, my cold personal repeating hell,
DÃ©jÃ Vu, I wish to god I didn’t remember!
Frozen tear melted when hit with a new dawns rays,
only then, do i fully understand, my hell, this unforgiving place,
the sky lightened as the sun brought me my new day,
and with each lighter shade, a found memory begins to fade.