The Traffic Stop

It was about 1:30 A.M. I was driving down a side road coming up to a stop sign. I flick on my left blinker and make the turn on to the highway. It seemed like I was the only car on the road.

Then I see headlights behind me and the car is fast approaching. I weave into the far right lane to let this guy go by but instead of speeding past, he mimicked me and got back behind me.

I ...

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Hotel Review

I stopped there on a trip to see my family. It is by far the worst place I have ever stayed. I had planned on staying for 3 nights but left after the first one. You would not believe how utterly repulsing this owner was!

When I arrived this old man was watching, which I’m pretty sure was Fox News. They were doing a piece on that one F’d up church. You know those guys who protest funerals of soldiers and ...

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Six Cauls: Making a cake.

A ? (Cauls) = One level of abstraction away from the reality of a situation.

?0 = I was making a cake but I ran out of sugar. I went next door to ask if I could borrow a cup to finish making the cake.

?1 = I was making a cake but ran out of cocaine. I went next door to ask if a cup of cocaine could make a mess on a chocolate bed.

?2 = I was making drawings of ...

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Hilarious: My Father's Last Joke.

My name is E. and to this day I’m not sure if I killed my father.

We were in room 218 of the Baltimore / Washington Medical Center. I was laying back in the recliner trying to sleep but my fathers’ breathing was strained by the oxygen mask on his face and the beeping noises of the machines prevented me from drifting off. I tried counting sheep but every time I got to 69 I thought of some other meaning for ...

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We Could be Anyone

“We could be anyone.”
“And nothing. I was just saying.”
“Just O.k.?”
“Was that not the right answer?”
“That depends on if you understood what I meant when I said: We could be anyone.”
“I suppose you are going to tell me now.”
“If you want to know.”
“That was not very enthusiastic.”
“I guess you are catching on then.”
“Well in that case I should just keep it to myself.”
“But on the other hand ...

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